Nat’s What I Reckon shares pulled pork recipe from his new cookbook

Get ready to redline the taco-meter champions, let’s do some time-travelling. Let’s get this pork on the go ’cause it takes a few hours to stew away. Pork shoulder is your friend here. Now, it may have a thick skin on it similar to a pork belly, so cut that shit off and save it to make something super awesome but also super unhealthy later. Dice your pork meat into big chunks about 5 cm square.

Peel and slice your onion however ya fucken want, it doesn’t heaps matter, and into a bowl that goes along with your coriander stalks. Garlic, all the garlic: peeled, diced blah blah bowl of its own.

Into an ovenproof casserole that has a lid goes the oil that you need to heat over medium–high. Season your pork with enough salt to lightly cover it and ‘send it’ into that hot pan to brown off for a few minutes so all sides are sealed. Now take it out of the pan and transfer to a plate.

Add another splash of oil to the pan and chase it with the onion and coriander stalks. 3–4 minutes later in goes the fuck-tonne of garlic, and cook for another couple of minutes until it’s softened.

Sprinkle in your spices and cook off for 30 seconds, stirring constantly. Fang in the tomatoes, tomato paste and stock and bring all that sick shit to a simmer, Simon. Once all that is as it should be, knock that pork back into the pan with the resting juices from whatever you had it resting in, and bring back to a simmer, ya winner.

Now let’s chill the heat right the fuck down and bang a lid on it, and cook for 2.5–3 hours, or until you can pull a piece of pork apart easily with a couple of forks. Don’t forget to check on ya stuff every now and then, give it a stir occasionally and make sure it’s not sticking to the bottom of the pan.

While all that is carrying on, it’s a ripper time to make the guacamole. There’s heaps of stupid shit people put in guacamole and sure sometimes it tastes okay, but personally I like the more traditional style. It’s a no shit, no fucking about recipe that is over before you know it. The way you make it (and I’m being totally cereal right now) is fucken put all the ingredients in a fucken bowl and with the back end of a fork squash it together . . . That’s actually it. Add more salt if it doesn’t taste salty enough and of course, feel free to squeeze in more lime if ya like but that is all it takes to fucken nail a sick guac. Cover and fang in the fridge till ya need it later.

Same goes with the quick pickle idea. Simply dump all the shit on that list in a fucken bowl and toss to combine and let chill. How fucken easy was that shit, eh?

Well, fu*k. . . It’s pretty smooth sailing from here, legends. Check on that pork at the 2.5-hour mark and if it’s easy to fucken bust apart then we are ed cheerin’. Grab those trendy forks of yours, bung on some Mumford and Sons, stamp one foot loudly as you get ready to pull some pork like it’s 2012, baby.

Remove the pot from the heat and get in there and shred that pork to bits. Be wowed by how easy this fucken shit is and even possibly at how old you’ve gotten in the last ten years. Stir through your beans, a tablespoon of brown sugar and a pinch of salt if you think it needs it. If it’s too thin a sauce for you, feel free to crank the heat back on the stove for a second and cook it down a touch.

Taco night is go! Grab ya guac and ya pickle, the 200 cleverly named hot sauces that are filling up your fucken pantry, coriander leaves, get the bloody sour cream out and of course shred your body weight in fucken cheese right into a bowl and stick it all on the kitchen table ready to rage. If you feel like really regressing, maybe even get an irritating hard-to-manage curled-up-corn-chip-style taco shell, wrap it in a soft one cause it’s not 1995 and you need structure in your life these days, and fill it with all that stuff however the fucken bloody hell you want. It’s taco night so get your mates over and punish them with your passé music taste while you all eat so many fucken tacos you feel like you might need to call for help.